This has been really tough on the both of us. I feel helpless when it comes to Jessica. I want to take the pain from her. When we found out the news that we will be losing the baby, she tried to stay strong by couldn’t hold back the emotions. I held her in my arms to comfort her. We headed to the hospital to await surgery. I tried my best to stay with her. I was up since 2:30 in the morning and couldn’t stay awake. I don’t know what it is about me but I don’t feel traumatic things right away. When I woke up at home the next day is when the pain set in and I began to cry.
Jessica is such a strong women and I love her for that. I look up to her in many ways.
So I have been experiencing some pain and discomfort myself. It started a month or so ago with tendinitis in my right elbow. Then with last Thursday waking up with lower back ache. I brushed it off as I slept wrong. Over the weekend I realized that it was more than that. The pain has been getting increasingly worse. It feels like a pinched nerve. I say that because if I stretch my arms over my head the pain subsides. Last night was the worst. I could not get comfortable. I tossed and turned. I woke this morning with back and hip pain. I’m now sitting at the walk in clinic waiting to be seen.
On top of everything that has transpired, I will be starting my treatment of interferon and Ribavirin this Friday for my Hepatitis C. I have an appointment with my doctor for the first injection at 4. My wife will be accompanying me to the appointment. The journey is about to begin. I’m nervous yet excited at the same time. I have been waiting a long time to start this. It’s finally here.
~ Phil
A journey through IVF 