Since my grandmothers passing I feel my faith has been restored. I was always the one who had no hope, no belief in anything. I always went through life having no certain direction or belief. My belief was nonexistent. It’s easy to be hopeless. Just ignoring the ever present signs that there is more to the universe than “I”. I heard someone say once that “I did not happen to the world, the world happened to me”. That holds true today. See when my grandmother passed for a moment I thought how could this happen to me??! How come I wasn’t there but my sister was?!! I was angry. But then something happened I realized in one moment that its not about me. It is much larger than me. It’s about my mother and father who took care of her for 30 years, it’s about her 8 children, 13 grandchildren and 23 great grandchildren alike. It’s about her friendships and its about get legacy. I have asked myself everyday since she left this earth and entered into the universe as a life energy to protect and guide “what would Valentina do?” And the answer is simple she would love, see beauty bin every creature, she would be kind and patient. She would be all of those spiritual principles that I strive to be on a daily basis.
Ill share with you who she was to me and my family… Her eulogy.
O what a beautiful morning, o what a beautiful day to celebrate the life of a one of a kind woman; Throughout her lifetime she was known as many things, a daughter, sister, wife, cousin, mother, aunt, niece, friend, grandmother and so much more. Anyone who met my grandmother knew that she was something special. To me she was beautiful, the kind of beauty that radiated from the inside out. Just as most of you, I enjoyed sitting with her and listening to her tell stories about her legacy. So, for a moment imagine yourself sitting down around the dining room table with her. Her asking you if you are hungry, and even if you aren’t, just to make her happy you grab a cup of coffee or tea, and begin to nibble on something sweet. This is the journey through her amazing life. She was born on January 23, 1916 in Fall River MA. She was one of 5 children, brought up in a home of modest beginnings. I believe that her early life shaped her, and created the unselfish person she became. She began working in factories at the tender age of 14. She made shoes, bullet dyes, and did her part during the war. She made a point to write letters each and every day to her brothers that were serving during World War 2. No matter what she did she always gave her heart and soul. She could stop traffic with her incredible legs, and became a pin up girl so to speak at her job at the Eyelet specialty. She met the love of her life when she went down flint for a dime and stopped into a little pub for a drink. Peter McGrail asked her out to the movies that day. He wooed her from the very start, showering her with gifts of perfume. They went on only one date before he left for the war and when he returned at Christmas 1944 he proposed to her and they were married on February 5, 1945. This is when her life truly began. She had 8 children whom she adored, and treated equally, never playing favorite. She made sure that all of their basic needs were met. She placed their well-being before her own. Even though they had little she never complained. Her home became the hub of the neighborhood. All of her children’s friends couldn’t wait to eat spaghetti dinners, and she accommodated the ever growing crowd. No matter the situation whether it was children falling through the dining room ceiling, attempting to run away, coming through the cinnamon toast line each morning, or covering up disputes between children such as the cashmere sweater incident, her demeanor was always the same, loving, caring, kind and compassionate. No matter the choices you made good and bad she was always supportive. She reassured you in a way that allowed you to make your own decisions and she continued to love you unconditionally and never made you feel like you were a failure. She was a woman of conviction making sure her family was treated respectfully and never felt less than. She had a great understanding that true family was made up of love and not material things. Through her life she had numerous pets and strays that eventually became her pets. She loved all creatures a like. She adored her grandchildren. She always made sure that we were all fed and never hungry. Before school, after school, or taking a dip in her favorite place to be…the pool, we would come inside for some of our favorite treats; silver dollar pancakes with homemade syrup, sauce and bread, and toasted cheese. Her generosity came from her heart, and her words. She taught us all lessons in a way that we could all understand because she did it with love and sincerity. Her lessons will be passed down through the generations. She created the family tradition of Sunday dinner, where we would all gather, eat and play games. Even as our family grew and people moved away, she still remained our matriarch and when she returned she brought us all together time and time again. When you were done eating and getting ready to leave she would always kiss you on the cheek, hug you and tell you that she loved you and to be sure to drive safe. What I will remember most about my grandmother is her smile that could light up a room, her laughter that was contagious, her skin as smooth as silk, her eyes that remained forever childlike and her stories that never ever grew old. We were all blessed to have her as long as we did. During her final days she showed me how strong and courageous she was, she never ever shed a tear. Her only concerns were of others until the end of her
time here on earth. She passed away peacefully just shy of her 97th birthday, at home surrounded by the family that she created. There is no doubt in my mind that she entered through the gates of heaven and returned to the arms of her soul mate and her brood of animals. Tonight and every night for the rest of our lives we can sleep peacefully knowing that we are all still in her ever growing list of prayers, that I am sure without a doubt she is reciting daily. And if we take one thing away from her legacy, let it be that LOVE never fails.
~ I love you grandma and remember you are beautiful!
See this is how I will remember her. Before she died she asked me if phil and i were going to try and have a baby again. She must see in me what I cannot see in myself, that I can be a good mother. She will live on through my mother, through me. This is what I want to teach my child; how to be humble and loving. Just like Valentina.
~ Jessica (transending)
A journey through IVF 